Well I am finally doing it

It happened a week ago Sunday.  Sarah, my Mom and I were all sitting on the couch in our front room, chatting about one thing or another and my Mom dropped the bomb on me. Thirty three years..... Thirty three years of deception, lies and inaccurate details.
In my heart of hearts, I had always thought that I was different, perhaps let's even throw around the adjectives like "unique, special, one in a million", but until a week ago Sunday, I didnt realize how unique, how special, how one in a million-ie.
You see, when I sank down on my incredibly comfortable, brown polyester couch that evening, I had no idea that an emotional hydrogen bomb was going to go off. I didn't know that without leaving the soft embrace of my sectional from heaven that I was going to be taken on a journey, a journey that could rival Alice's trip down the rabbit hole or Gulliver traveling to the land of the midgets.
You see dear friends I was told a tale spun with suspense, the finest faux fur money can buy and heart break. I was told of a baby, a baby found off the shores of Mazatlan in a basket woven of rose petals and honey comb. A baby that had been given a better chance of life than being surrounded by the pressures of the future that had been in store for it.... or should I say in store for him. Yes, it is true, I was that baby. I was the one found washed upon the golden sand in a basket made of unusual materials to make a basket with. The truth is, I am not really a Bast, but through a series of highly complicated tests involving DNA, Photosynthesis and other un-explainable science we were able to determine, within these last few days, that I am actually the love child of Stevie Wonder and Julie Andrews.

How did it happen, why did it happen? Some cases are best left un-solved, but never the less this new revelation has certainly made things a lot clearer.

Well it didnt happen exactly like that, but this story seemed so much more interesting than what I was am about to say so... whatever.

Last Sunday we were sitting in my front room. My Sarah said, "Dude get off your butt, write a book"

My mom said, "Yeah lazy a$$, amount to something in your life." so I said "Fine" and I am writing a book.

I am about 25 pages in so I am pleased with myself, but still have about 70 thousand words to go, give or take a thousand here or there.